A Glimpse of the Kingdom by David W. Pendergrass, Ph.D.

I see four types of people in Church: the non-believer, the Adult Christian, the Teenager Christian, and the Infant Christian. These designations have nothing to do whatsoever with the person's actual age. The non-believer. Every congregation has a population of people who think they are Christian, but are not. Deep down, even if they wouldn’t articulate it this way, they believe that being a Christian means “acting like my Ideal Self around other people who also act like their Ideal Selves and we all learn to do Church.” This is what old Christians call, “good churchmen.” They are institutionalized “Christians.” They know how to behave while at Church, but have never experienced a true, real, confession and repentance to God. Why? Because they believe their Ideal Self isn’t that bad, really. Not really . They’re not nearly as bad as those prostitutes or drug dealers or murderers or homosexuals or . . . whatever. But, for the part of them that admits some wrong, they are...

There’s a ubiquitous problem that occurs in relationships. It’s most obvious in marriages, but if one looks closely, you can see it in so many other kinds of relationships. It’s a subtle problem; it creeps up on you before you realize it. The problem is manifested in our communication. For many of us, our relationships are based on problem-solving. Think about what you talk about among your co-workers the most: solving problems. Most of us spend most of the day at work solving problems. Be productive! That’s our goal. (I even often hear people ask for God to "help them be productive.") And to be productive, most of our conversations are about solving problems. This habit at work surreptitiously spills over into other relationships. Before we know it, spouses spend an enormous amount of their communication problem-solving. “What’s for dinner?” “Did you fix that leak?” “Have you called your parents lately?” “Who will pick up our kids from school?” “Can you take her ...