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Showing posts from August, 2017

My greatest struggle

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I’ve never written a blog like this before because I’ve never wanted this blog to be about me. But, I feel compelled to compose this now for some reason. Maybe it’ll help me; maybe it’ll help someone else. I suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I’ve had it for years. It affects me every single day. I’ve been through therapy. I’ve read books and listened to lectures. Yes, I’ve prayed about it. I pray about it nearly every single day, in fact, because I live in a low-grade constant fear and anxious state. PTSD is a debilitating anxiety disorder caused by an intense, traumatic experience (or experiences).  It actually re-wires the neural networks in your brain, so that the brain becomes “hot-wired” to freak out. This is called having “triggers.” It’s where your brain responds before your pre-frontal cortex (where your consciousness does its work) can respond to the situation. You can feel the blood leave your head, a panic attack, or gorgonizing anxiety and then think,

What if life wasn't what you thought it was?

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Imagine if you overheard two people talking about life. They were both tired. One complained and complained about how much things didn’t go the way she wanted. She was forced to get up early to go to work. People screamed at her. She had to do exercises. The other person somewhat liked it. There was real camaraderie among the people where they lived. Yet, she, too, didn’t like that life wasn’t what she expected. She didn’t know why so many things happened that caused her pain, even if she did seem to get stronger because she trained so much. What difference would it make if you were to walk up to these two people talking and say, “I couldn’t help but overhear your conversation. Did you know that you’re in a boot camp? You’re in the Army: this is Basic Combat Training. Did you know that the reason why you’re going through all this stuff is because people are trying to get you prepared for battle?” See what a difference proper context and perspective can make? It’s like that abo